Tag Archives: supplementary school teachers

A Q & A : with a Jewish teen’s cell phone

There's an app for that?

There’s an app for that?

I recently followed a WordPress blog that offers a daily dollop of inspiration to bloggers.

What a gift, right?

Today’s challenge: “Write a Q & A style interview with an inanimate object.”

So, with a nod of thanks to WordPress, here goes:

Reporter (R): So, I see that you’re a smart phone, right?

Teen’s Cell Phone (C): Duh, you can see the apps, can’t you? (Did I mention that this cell phone has an attitude and a particularly expensive-looking case?)

R: Okay, point well taken. So, I do see that you have tons of apps. Impressive.

Any Jewish ones?

C: Wha? Jewish apps? Never heard of that. Anywhere. You’re kiddin’ right?

R: Nope. (trying to sound cool). Know what the Hebrew date is? There’s an app for that.

R: Feel like whipping up some latkes? Matzo balls? Check out the Jewish cooking app.

(Gaining traction here). Mood strike you to see when Passover is? There’s an app for that too.

(All of a sudden, C ‘s index finger finds the App store, and the keyboard starts buzzing when C starts to search for Jewish apps.)

C: No way!!!! Jewish rock music? Free??? Jewish Quotes? From the Bible? Cool!!! Live streaming radio from ISRAEL? No way!

R: Yes, way.

C: There should be a class on this! Well, maybe not a class….that’s going, like, way too far. But some way for me and my owner to find out.

(Getting a little sad….) Like in Hebrew school I have to keep out of sight. In my owner’s backpack. Or pocket. Or worse….on the teacher’s desk where I know my owner feels the lifeline is gone.

(Feeling guilty here…) My owner once got in real bad trouble, so I’m off-limits.

But, someone should tell someone there’s all this cool stuff….

R: So  noted.

Photo credit: Patrick Gage


Jewish Culture: Enough For Our Teens?

what will keep Jews marrying Jews?

What Will Keep Jews marrying Jews?

At a recent holiday party, I had been speaking with a Pastor of  the Calvary Full Gospel Church.  He introduced me to his wife who comes from a Greek Orthodox background.

Her choice, to be in a relationship with this person who practiced differently and lived outside her cultural community, set off a flurry of shunning behavior.

Why?

Similar to the themes in the film “My Big Fat Greek Wedding“, her parents felt she was going outside the fold and giving up her Greek culture to marry this man. She would become part of his church. To them and her community, she was assimilating.

Who would continue the cultural traditions? Historical traditions would be lost. Future generations would not know their ways.

Sound familiar? Unfortunately, to many it does.

Here’s just one tiny example, from an article in the New York Times wedding section. Make your own decision about the relevance Judaism has for this couple:

“For Mitch, brought up Protestant, and his wife, Emma (nee Weise, of Jewish descent), religion is best practiced through matzo balls and pickled herring from Zabar’s.”

Here’s what the Pastor told me when he explained that his wife’s parents shouldn’t have been surprised by her choice:

“Culture will never be enough of a pull to keep someone connected to their traditions. There has to be more.”

Becoming very interested in the direction this conversation was taking, I asked:

“Can you describe ‘more’? ”

As he elaborated, his words resonated with me and my work with Jewish teens.

“If you’re not reaching people deeply, through a spiritual and God connection, commitment will never be there.”

His wife joined in at that point. “Sure, I went to church, but it never really touched me. It was so mechanical. I didn’t feel a reason to be there.”

So, what are the reasons we want our teens to ‘stay Jewish’?

I think every Jewish parent and educator needs to answer this question.

Are the primary reasons cultural?

We all know that ‘bagels and lox’ Judaism doesn’t mean a poppy-seed for the long haul. Epitomizing the height of cultural fluff, has Chanukah been enough of an attraction to stave off assimilation and help young adults stay connected?

Luscious latkes and games of dreidel can easily exist within other frameworks as cultural add-ons.

I’ve read about weddings (between two non-Jewish partners) that have incorporated marriage canopies and glass-breaking ceremonies because it’s a nice touch.

Cultural-isms migrate very nicely. Deeper connections are harder to give up.

We do know this. It’s why the assimilation rate of Orthodox Jews is so much less. Community pulls. So does a belief system.

So, where are we with what we’re providing our Jewish teens? When will we decide that in order to increase their long-term connection we have to go deep?

What spiritual connections are we building that will sustain them through adulthood? What will keep Jews marrying Jews?

What is your feedback? I’ll share your comments and add my own in future posts.

Photo credit: FreeDigitalPhotos.net


Three Jewish Teens: Tons of Time? Not

What clock do these teens use?

What clock do these teens use?

I’ll paint the picture. Last night I chatted with a group of three 9th grade teenage boys, hanging out in the synagogue lobby, waiting for a ride home after attending a community pluralistic supplementary Jewish high school program in suburbia.

What I didn’t know, is that right in front of me, was such a rich representation of Jewish teen life.

Typical teens. Phones in hand, either texting or waiting for one. Yet they were so willing to answer my questions after I introduced myself.

“So, how are you guys doing?”

“Great!”

“How’s your time here been?”

“Cool, we like it.”

“Glad to hear it! So, do you “do” anything else ‘Jewish’?”

“Yea.”

“Like what?”

The three of them proceeded to tell me what they do.

They’re active (hold positions on committees) in the synagogue’s youth group, USY. There’s more.

They also attend a Jewish summer camp sponsored by HaBonim Dror (not affiliated with the synagogue/youth group). There’s more.

They also participate in a once a month boys-only group sponsored by Moving Traditions.

They also just started high school.

How do these boys have the time?

Do they get more hours in a day than the average teen? Are they more organized? Less social? Less academic?

No. No. No. and No.

You can figure it out. It ‘s what sets some families apart from others. We know who they are.

They’re the ones who know that for teens, multiple connection points to the Jewish community is proven to be a good thing—for character, and all those other intangibles I’ve written about previously.

That’s what the studies haven’t been able to quantify.

Who are those parents? What drives them to make the decisions they do? How can we support them? Find more of them?


When You Say “Jewish Community,” Who are You Talking About?

Image

The largest collection of open-ocean animals found in an aquarium

Who is in your Jewish community? Really, start to define who you consider a part of your community.

Do you get a static or lively impression? Are there people of all ages and religious movements in your community? Or is it limited to who belongs where you belong?

What I’ve written about here, is that often “membership” dictates who is in your community. Whether it’s synagogue or JCC, ‘belonging’ seems to define who is in your immediate Jewish community.  Gone from that definition of community are those individuals who have not signed up right along with you, those who tend to be on the fringe.

Not a great way to teach teens that the Jewish community is a fluid, open-networked concept.

With today’s networked world, we really can move beyond the boundaries of walls to begin to define who we are.

I am not saying that belonging is bad, it’s a very good thing to be part of something greater than yourself.

But if your only connection to the Jewish community is where you hold a formal ‘memberships’, you might be missing out on meeting others who haven’t ‘joined’. What are ways that you might connect to the larger Jewish community?

What if every city had a portal to Jewish life, with links to all things Jewish in the area—one that was interactive, and came with a live chat option with a ‘Concierge’? How great would that be? That helpful person would help you navigate through the many options available to you, no matter what your age.

From a pluralistic point of view, that means that everyone gets represented in the community stew.

And your Jewish community just expanded into an open, fluid, and networked concept, just right for the web 3.0 world.

 


SuperStorm #Sandy: Getting Beyond OMG!

OMG

OMG (Photo credit: mac.lachlan)

In our terribly connected world, we’re never really far from seeing devastation up close.  Like unwilling voyeurs, we watch some fantastic yet unreal world that is occurring in real-time right in front of us—-on a screen in our kitchens, dens, and yet the media itself creates an incredible distance to whatever we’re seeing.

It’s like the caricature of a parent eagerly taping her child’s recital while missing the real impact of the performance.

We see instant pictures, read tweets and blogs, hear news updates, and feel others’ pain very acutely. But it passes. Too soon.

At these times I’m sure most of us think about the fragility of life. The thread that holds everything together sometimes feels very slippery indeed. We can take this as adults. What we need to do is open conversations with our teens about what they’re witnessing beyond the OMG! reactions.

How do they feel about the loss of human control these events portray?

What other events have happened in their lives when they felt a loss of control?

What helps them gain a sense of strength?

How can they focus on gratitude for the ordinary?

Do they think about G-d in any of these contexts?

Here’s our chance as Jewish educators, parents, and teachers to help facilitate these conversations.


Jewish Teens: Do you want to be the same or different?

Figuring out where you stand is the challenge

I believe every Jewish teen has to make a fundamental decision, especially when getting ready to think about college.

Behind that decision are responses to feelings about Jewish identity.

The question begins with: How do I feel about being Jewish?

Is there anything in the way I feel about my heritage that makes me different?

Is there anything I do that makes me feel different?

How do those differences contribute to who I am? Are these differences that I should celebrate or run away from?

Would I rather be the same or different from other students who aren’t Jewish?

Are our Jewish teens getting any guidance about this?

These prompts are either-or in nature, though we know that life is not generally like that.

But in order to really prioritize values, the black-white choices are what helps clear the dust from the corners.

Underlying any choice is the light shining on the things that matter for our teens’ future Jewish involvements in college and beyond.

There are no easy answers to this one.  It depends on what the family has decided to value.

Research and studies have shown that the more multiple connections to Jewish life, the more Jewish identity is secured.

But that only matters if Jewish parents want their teens to maintain their differences.

Right now, the pull seems to be toward sameness.

Are you facing these challenges? Please share your thoughts.

Related articles

Photo source: wikimedia.org


These Questions Weren’t Answered in Hebrew School

Jew street

Will Jewish Teens Find Answers Here?

Hebrew School may answer questions like “what do I need to know for my Bar/Bat Mitvah” but there are many questions Jewish pre-teens have about Judaism that most schools just don’t have the opportunity to answer.

I was teaching a class to eighth graders called “What Makes Me Jewish?” and for an opening ice breaker, I asked them (95% of whom ‘graduated’  a typical Hebrew school, 100%  had become a Bar/Bat Mitzvah) to respond to  “A question I have about Judaism is…..” with one of their most pressing questions.

This exercise is interesting on two levels. One, it lets us know what students of this age wonder about. On another level, it demonstrates quite candidly, though from a very small sample, what Hebrew School can and can’t accomplish.  It does help make the case for continued Jewish education.

The questions ranged from the very general to the very specific.  Some are humorous, some reflective, some painfully poignant.

All are worth noting.

I have not left any question out. Here are their questions:

What does Judaism think about Heaven and Hell?

What is mysticism?

Why are tattoos bad (sic) in Judaism?

Why do we bow to the ark/G-d, if we aren’t supposed to worship idols?

How does the Jewish calendar work? When is the leap year and why?

Why are the jews (sic) always the scapegoat?

If we believe in G-d, why does the beginning of B’reisheet (Genesis) use the plural form of G-d? (this questioner clearly has done some studying of the Bible to ask this question)

What are the different values or points of view between the different types (sic) of Judaism?

Why do we have kashrut rules?  (yes, this student wrote ‘kashrut’ instead of kosher!)

What is it like to be a teen in Israel?    (interesting, this student’s question was not exactly about Judaism, but an inference made about Israeli teens).

How do we know that everything in the Torah is true? (notice that the questioner doesn’t write “if everything” but “that everything”)

How many religious Jews are there in Israel?

How many rules of the 613 do we actually follow these days? (immense credit is given for knowing the number of mitzvot –   commandments!).

Why are we looked down upon as Jews?

What do kosher Jews (sic) think about Jews who don’t keep kosher?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

What do you think of these questions?  As an adult, how similar or different are the questions you have? Did you have these questions as a teenager?

Photo Credit: Flickr JP

Related articles